Tetrazzini Fellowship

Dear Governor DeWine,   My name is Kay Schneider, I am a religious evangelist based in Northeast Ohio, and I oppose House Bill 8. I have several reasons why I oppose HB 8; these being: 1. I'd Really Rather You Didn't compel irreligious school board members to adopt or establish religious released time policies, as this may run afoul of the First Amendment. 2. I’d Really Rather You Didn’t add to the workload of school boards when they are already required to adopt or establish policies by at least 23 other sections (3313.20 to 3313.98) of the Ohio Revised Code.   3. I’d Really Rather You Didn’t neglect to inform those in favor of increasing the workload of school boards that Section 3313.602 of the Ohio Revised Code already states: “(B)… the board of education … shall ensure that the principles of democracy and ethics are emphasized and discussed wherever appropriate in all parts of the curriculum for grades kindergarten through twelve. (C) Each … school board shall a...

The beginnings of my Pastafarian ministry took root in March 2020, when I was trying to find truth in the mire of the media of the time.  Seven months prior, I'd resigned my position on a church Administrative Board after piecing together a trail of deception by the Pastor.  I was done  with being "preached at" in 2019, and the media climate of 2020 filled me with disgust. My unsuccessful search for truth in March 2020 left me feeling very low... so low that I slogged to Virginia Beach to stare at the Atlantic Ocean.  At Virginia Beach, I found comfort - because no matter how many things were shut down, Mother Nature and her tides wouldn't be scared into submission. Even with the peaceful waves in view, I kept searching for truth in media content.  I searched all the major religions for their statements on the demands for submission.  I searched... and searched... and searched.   I wish I could remember exactly what linked me to the Church of the ...

This letter from 1999, written by Salman Rushdie, tickles my Pastafarian brain - especially since it predates Rep. Henderson's 2005 revelation. Excerpt from Letters to the Six Billionth World Citizen: --- Dear little Living Person: As one of the newest members of a notoriously inquisitive species, it probably won't be too long before you start asking the two questions with which the rest of us have been wrestling for some time: How did we get here? And, now that we are here, how shall we live? Oddly - it will almost certainly be suggested to you that the answer to the question of origins requires you to believe in the existence of a further, invisible, ineffable Being "somewhere up there", an omnipotent creator whom we poor limited creatures are unable even to perceive, much less to understand.  That is, you will be strongly encouraged to imagine a heaven, with at least one god in residence. This sky god, it's said, made the universe by churning its matter in a gi...

If you're curious about the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, but are hesitant to sign up at spaghettimonster.org , here are some excerpts from the warm welcome you can expect to receive from Rep. Bobby Henderson: " We're thrilled to welcome you to the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM)!  As a church that has been sailing under the radar for hundreds of years, we're happy to have you onboard as we navigate the waters of faith, community, and the holy power of Pasta.  In our Church, you'll find Believers, skeptics, Pirates, and noodle enthusiasts of all sorts.  ... Whether you're here because you feel a deep connection with the FSM, or you're drawn to our values, humor, or community, your place in our congregation is cherished. Even if you're skeptical or a member of another religion, you're always welcome here.  Of course not everyone will agree about religion.  Let's remember to take part in healthy discussions with those who se...

 The Eight I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts #1 I’d Really Rather You Didn’t act like a sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou ass when describing my Noodly Goodness. If some people don’t believe in Me, that’s okay. Really, I’m not that vain. #2 I’d Really Rather You Didn’t use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know...be mean to others.  #3 I’d Really Rather You Didn’t judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, okay?  #4 I’d Really Rather You Didn’t indulge in conduct that offends yourself, or your willing, consenting partner of legal age AND mental maturity.  #5 I’d Really Rather You Didn’t challenge the bigoted, misogynist, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, then go after the bastards. #6 I’d Really Rather You Didn’t build multimillion-dollar churches/temples/mosques/shrines to my Noodly Goodness when the money could be better spent (Take your pick): 1. Endin...

Welcome to the blog of Tetrazzini Fellowship! If you've recently discovered us, perhaps you found our propaganda flyer. Here  is a map of  where our Evangelism has taken us so far. UPDATE: Where legally allowed, we are happy to share flyers by mail.  Send us your mailing address through our email link on the profile page and we will ship you a gift asap!  Mailing info will never be shared or used for marketing.  We're glad you found us  - May Peace and Pasta be With You!